Barts hospital, blood test, blood tests, camera, cancer, Colonoscopy, Hospital, lymphocytes, Platelets, results, surprise, White blood cells
Hi chaps and chappetes, sorry for the rather angry message on Thursday, I did warn you with the title page though 🙂
I did go into the hospital, as suggested by my consultant, on Thursday.
The ward (7a) we went to was for drop in patients and was much more swish than the normal waiting room. The people were just as ill mind.
The day was really case of good news/bad news so i will present it as such, just to keep it interesting.
Good news: They were very quick and took blood tests promptly, as well as being nice and happy to talk about it all. Very efficient seems I only texted my Doctor on Wednesday.
Bad News: I needed to go in at all. no one likes to find blood in their stool and of all the things I’ve addressed that could have been the most potentially embarrassing one. Also its very disconcerting to wipe and see bright red, opposed to the normal um, soilish colour. Then when it goes away you try and forget about it. Then it happens again and you realise you probably better ought to flag it up, especially when you have a condition. Its always an embarrassing topic though.
Still we’ll struggle through, hey?
Good News: During the physical examination the doctor said I had no piles and was very clean. That’s reassuring isn’t it? No one wants to be the patient who isn’t described as ‘very clean’ Also the foetal (not fecal) position because the bed wasn’t quite long enough was amusing. ‘Just lay on your left side, it’ll be over quickly…’
Bad News: The nice doctor then stuck her finger up my bum. This was to check for tears or cuts. There were none. This didn’t make it anymore comfortable, especially as, you know, the gel was cold.
Good News: They don’t think its serious, or at least not spleen related. They weren’t 100% sure though, so they took some more blood.
Bad News: Because they aren’t sure I will personally be having a live webcam show hosted exclusively from my colon. yes, you heard it here first people, its camera up the bum time. I asked if I could stream it live on my blog, but people seem to be surprisingly anti that… something about knowing me well enough already. Just in case you didn’t know,
A colonoscopy is a procedure that allows your doctor to look at the lining of your large bowel (colon and rectum) for polyps, inflammation or signs of cancer.
After all this ‘fun’, I then went back to the office and pretended I hadn’t had my personal body violated. Before too long I had a phone call, which I obviously missed. Then I had to bounce around to get my results, which lead me to
They gave me my blood results.
Firstly I didn’t need a transfusion. Good times.
Red blood 4.5
Lymphocyte Count 18.7
White blood cell count 24
Now to those of you slightly less observant (read obsessive) about their results this may mean nothing. Bearing in mind that the last 6 month stretch they went up a point a month. So let me put them next to my previous results. (see below or at https://spleniclymphoma.com/2014/10/19/fourth-blood-test-results/
So from March to September (just under 6 months) of this year my lymphocytes went up 5 points and my white cell count went 5.9 points.
In the last three months my lymphocytes went up 0.5 and my white cells 0.3.
This is excellent news as it means if this was continued I would’t need treatment until 2076. (bum camera pending).
Ok, so I might be a bit ridiculous about that last point, but its good news either way. I’m not sure what I’ve done differently in the last 3 months, other than move out of London, but it must be working. If I could work out what it was that would be very good.
Maybe its the longer walk through woodland in the morning? I haven’t been eating healthier. I haven’t been stressing (Thursday excluded), but i rarely do. I’ve not been ill.
Hmm, maybe its just a random fluctuation, but long may it continue.
I’ll give it some more thought anyway.
So Long story short, colonoscopy in the next few weeks, but otherwise really good. Just in time for Christmas (the good, not the camera).
I also have an update which was kindly shared by Sam Eggleton, on the comment page (thanking you for all your support) which I need to digest and give you.
Either way I wish you guys all the best for your Christmas! Thank you for following and keep well!
clare derby said:
Poor you – bottoms are never fun when it’s medical … However, I had a colonoscopy quite recently and it’s really not as bad as it sounds. The key to getting through it is seeing the funny side and being determined to impress with how incredibly relaxed and laid back you are. Plan the opening chapter for your next novel and bear in mind that while you may be embarrassed, for the doc it’s just another day at the office. If you are lucky you’ll be offered what are hilariously described as’modesty shorts’.. Definitely say yes because these will take you to the door in a very jolly mood. They are sort of paper basket ball shorts with a hole. Oh and I got to watch mine on the bedside telly. It’s not.’Blue Peter’ but it’s certainly better than ‘EastEnders’!!! Good luck xxx
So sorry to hear you had to have the colonoscopy. Brings tears to the eyes just thinking about it. Hope tests come back negative. It’s lovely that you have kept your sense of humour. My husband often had to have fingers up his backside, and he hated it. He said that for men it’s the worst thing to have done, and he didn’t even have the’ fun’ of a nice nurse doing it, it was always a bloke. Wishing you a happy Christmas. Love, Rosy